Starting tomorrow is ComicCon in San Diego, the place to be for not just comics, but movies, and toys, and anything else that makes nerds and fan boys drool. It’s the biggest event of its kind, hence why major announcements are always made to start a title-wave of buzz and excitement. But there’s only one that I’m looking towards, one which I’ve been waiting almost my entire lifetime for:
Yesterday, my coworker Steve showed me this, the personal website of Don Murphy, a Hollywood producer…
Just one look at the splash, and there’s quite a few films which anybody should be familiar with. But notice the small, Optimus Prime to the upper right? Click on it and you’ll get the following message: MAJOR ANNOUNCEMENT COMING – COMICCON 2004. Could it be, at long last, the official announcement of a live action Transformer film?!?!?!
This possible news fills my heart with both joy and sadness. First the joy part. I’ll start by saying about fucking time. I’m surprised it’s taken this long for a big screen, live action adaptation to finally get underway, especially since the wave of films based cartoons and tv shows has sorta passed. But 80′s nostalgia is still in effect, and this film could be it’s Citizen Kane.
Actually, I think I know why it’s taken so long: money. Considering how much special effects would have to be used, and every frame of computer animation costs thousands, It would have been financially impossible to do an even half way decent live action interpretation. So filmmakers had to wait for just the right time, when the technology would be readily available, and at just the right cost.
In comes Dreamworks. As I’ve been told, they recently created a massive motion capture workshop for the upcoming (and highly creepy looking) Polar Express. Now that the film is in the final production phase, the studio still has all this technology lying around, waiting to be used, and they’ve been shopping it around town. So it’s been theorized said technology might at last make a Transformer movie, most importantly a good one a reality at least.
Even if it’s not, I really don’t care. I already know it could never live up to my exceptions. I just want Transfomers to finally go completely mainstream. I already see way too many gaudy Autobot and Decepticon logo shirts being worn by people my age who also happen to the same types that made fun of me in grade school for always drawing them and talking about the show, so why stop there? I want to go to the Union Square movie theater and see women in their mid-thirties walk away disappointed that “the Transfomers movie” is sold out.
As for the feeling sadness part, that’s because a Transformers movie finally happening and I’m not directing it. It has always been a life long dream to direct the live action adaptation, and for years now, I even had an idea for a fake trailer, which I could easily do and distribute on the internet, in hopes of generating buzz and a possible movie contract (I think we’ve all seen those stories from Entertainment Tonight of some Hollywood exec catching some crazy vid some obsessed fan did in his basement and saying, “Wait a sec, this kid’s got talent! I think we’ve found the new director for Iron Man the movie!”)
EDIT: By the way, and I suppose this is as good a time as any to post this, here’s a site that has some Transformer porn, which I found a long time ago, but lost the link, and recently rediscovered thanks to memepool:
http://razormoon.fateback.com/consort/
I really love the author’s explanation of Transformer sex…
“My general standpoint on TF sex is that they’re all gender neutral, just with different styling & personality types that sometimes read as female or male to a human audience. Of course, that’s hardly any fun from the fanfic point of view, so yes of *course* Tracks is gay, Starscream is bi and Soundwave is straight as a board.”
Nice to see there’s no confusion regarding Sounwave’s sexuality, but I’m sorry… I had Tracks as a kid, and that guy was not gay.
