“Drems Do Come True”

So SPX was this past weekend and there were plenty of hijinks all throughout. Here are my highlights…

- Kicked things off by meeting up with MK Reed the night before the show in Jersey. Spent the evening in her hometown by the Jersey shore in a dilapidated beach house with MK’s friend Morgan. Highlights that night includes me tracking dog shit into the house, swapping traumatizing childhood incidents (and I’m chock full of those), and drinking some chicken wine.

- Morgan is a super crazy Jersey girl, but totally cool. Among the many nuggets of truths she enlightened me with, the most useful was her method for dealing with homeless people: ask them for money before they get the chance to say anything first. And for an added touch, say the money is for strippers. Plus it was fun watching her get into a war of words with the cranky old sandwich making woman at Wawa the next morning.

- The con itself was pretty much as expected: packed with awesome folks and their comics. Since I was there for the whole three days. and with no real business to conduct, the trip was for purely pleasure; the year prior I went with Jason on the behalf of our company. In fact, we were even called ?the PixelJump guys? last time by Dave.

- Speaking of, my very first stop was to visit Dave and the rest of the Cryptic Press crew at their table where the newest Teen Boat was for sale. The book was also nominated for an Ignatz in the category of best debut book, and I was given a VOTE BOAT button to help spread the word.

- Also got the chance to speak, and hang out with, quite a few other cool people, some who I only see at shows, such as Todd Webb and Toby Craig (who had me do a sketch in his book and like a retard, I misspelled the word dreams). Joel Carrol, whom I first met at the prior year?s expo (and was absolutely amazed that I had even heard of the game Geist which he was working on at the time) was in attendance. When we met, we immediately swapped game music; I knew he wanted the soundtrack to Katamari Damacy and he had some tunes from Mr. Driller for trade.

- The kindest, most gentle cartoonist in the world, Nate Powell was present, and I finally got a chance to pick up a copy of It Disappears (which I forgot to do last time I saw him) and chatted with Paul Hornschemeier who finally had Forlorn Funnies #5 available.

- I was pretty shocked to see Farel at the show, whom I thought was still living in Europe. He had with him an Italian copy of his Pop Gun War trade, which I was told via our mutual friend Stephy, was all over Venice this summer. Farel brought along a buddy from Oklahoma, a really nice guy named Joe, and we would both bond over shared loved for death metal (you should have seen his eyes light up when he realized that I knew who the hell Cannibal Corpse was).

- Plus I got to hang out with Katie Skelly, a good friend of MK?s that I met at this past summer?s MoCCA fest. Once again, she had an ultra cute mini comic on hand, this time illustrating some bad poetry written by teenagers from the net. Plus she had some really cute, hand made pockets that were actually condom holders. I got a green one.

- The first day ended with dinner at a burrito place, though the best thing I ate that night was some garlic bread. The highlight of the meal for everyone (there was almost 20 of use eating outside) was watching various folks go into the sex shop next door, like the nerd and hot lady couple (she was obviously a prostitute) and some guy with a penis hat.

- Afterwards, I hung out at the lobby of the hotel like everyone else to drink and mingle. Almost every single person was exhausted from staying up all night drawing, stapling, and driving, so folks were just plain out of it. Farel was found super loaded and he wanted me to go to Baltimore with him and check out some strip clubs, but I passed (though I almost wanted to go just to watch him make an ass out of himself in front of strippers). Plus our mainly display of affection annoyed some (as Farel embraced me and swung around, we did hit some people). The rest of the evening was spent chatting with MK and her friend Robin in my hotel room (plus we watched the last bit of Cabin Fever).

- Day one was spent checking out the goods, so day two was spent actually picking stuff up, though this year it was a pretty big problem. First off, the fact is that there?s always simply too much cool stuff to be found. But also, most of the money I had saved up for the show was spent just days prior on a brand new PS2. I was not looking forward to the PStwo, so once when I came across the older unit, and brand new, I knew it was my possibly last chance to get one (the older ones are impossible to find thanks to a shortage that?s been going on all year). Plus with some of the stuff I saw I really couldn?t remember if I already had it or, and if so, if I wanted to get an extra for myself, or maybe as a gift.

- Though at a certain point, and I am a bit embarrassed to admit this, I did get a bit bored of the con (I?d like to think it?s somewhat easy if it?s a small show like SPX, or if you?re not busy selling your own stuff or manning a booth) so I went back to room and watch the final top 20 in E!?s top 100 moments in SNL. Most simply did not make any sense; yeah they were funny, but to be in the top 20? At least the Will Farrell/Christopher Walken/Blue Oyster Cult cowbell sketch was number 3 or 4 or something.

- In addition to hanging out with old buddies, I met some new faces. Finally got to shake hands with K. Thor Johnsen, a.k.a. “Amber”. Besides having comics, he had for sale DVDs filled with wacky shit, and I?m all about wacky shit, so I got one. He seemed genuinely surprised to meet someone who?s familiar with the Turkish movie that has Spider Man vs. Captain America vs. Santos (a famous Mexican wrestler) and seemed eager for me to pass along my copy of Iranian Alf. Plus, he?s familiar with perhaps the wrongest film of all time, Karate Ruler, and just might be the only person who can help me get a copy of its sequel, Karate Lover.

- I also met Alexander Danner, the editor of the Graphic Novel Review, who besides being super friendly, also (as Dave pointed out) looks like we could be related. Anyway, we swapped stories related to our childhood encounters with firemen.

- One of the neater things that were on-hand was a machine that dispensed mini-comics for 50 cents. Almost as cool as the Long Tail Kitty comic that was sealed in a personalized envelope by Lark Pien herself, which was so nice that to this day, I still don?t want to open it.

- Also at the show was BB&PPINC which again had uber cute shirts for sale. Unfortunately there weren?t any new ones available (perhaps there were but were sold out; their stuff was super popular). And again, I got to chat with the really nice French girl who?s behind it all. Did I mention that one of the best things about small press cons are the multiple of cute girls?

- Dinner that evening was at the Tastee Diner, which was notorious for it?s rude service, but the last time I went, everyone was friendly, so there were fears things had changed. So it was awesome to hear our waiter get impatient with Todd who was too busy fucking around to hear that this drink was ready (?Alright pal, stay alert.?). I won?t bother with the details, but at a certain point I wanted to ask the waiter if the thought in Demolition Man, regarding the fake, suspended animation Sly Stallone, also had a penis, but I really didn?t want a punch in the face.

- Todd and I also played tic tac toe at dinner, but instead of using Xs and Os, we first used countries, which later to simply locations (I foolishly put Cybertron in the wrong spot and Todd got the win with Never Never Land). The next game started with locations, but morphed to movie scenes?

? And here?s how the game went?

Move 1 / me / center row, right square: I knew a kid who told me how in LI, he and his buddy would go to Dunkin Donuts to go through, and eat, all the donuts the place would throw out at 4 in the morning.

Move 2 / Todd / center row, left square: A scene from Clash of the Titans, with Zeus setting the Kraken loose.

Move 3 / me / center row, middle square: A real incident in which some guy who was trimming the hedges at the World?s Fair in Canada (Expo 86) had his head over a rollercoaster rail and couldn?t hear the train coming (he had his headphones on), wad decapitated, and had his head fly over half a mile to land on the roof of the China pavilion (where my family and I were having lunch right next door).

Move 4 / Todd / bottom row, middle square: Stonehenge with Derek Smalls (from Spinal Tap) in the background.

Move 5 / me / bottom row, left square: Tron versus the just resurrected Stark in the climactic confrontation from the 80?s classic (and which is much better than the Matrix, btw).

Move 6 / Todd / top row, right square: Richard Dreyfus creating a mash potato mountain from Close Encounters.

Move 7 / me / top row, middle square: Staying on the Spielberg tip, the scene the aliens unearth a frozen Haley Joel Osment in A.I.

Move 8 / Todd / top row, left square: Yet another thrilling movie scene, this one from one of the Ewoks movies.

At this point, Todd declared me winner by default since he could no further, though to make it official, I should have drawn in the last square a scene from Gremlins 2 as I originally planned (something with the sexy Gremlin).

- And I love how in almost every conversation, every single Ninja Turtle reference I made quickly became a Napoleon Dynamite reference.

- Later in the night, I caught the first episode of the new season of SNL (not nearly enough Riggle was to be seen) at Todd?s room, went down to the lobby and hung out with Andy Runton) where we went over the marketing possibilities for his character Owly (I?m sorry, but Owly sausages sounds good to me), ran into Farel who was again drunk, then Sarah Varon who told me about a party, which I later checked out. Caught up with Heidi MacDonald (didn?t know she was such a fan of Diablo 2) until it was past 4 in the morning and time to go to bed.

- The last day was pretty low key. Finished up with all my key purchases, said some goodbyes, and helped MK at her table for the rest of the show. Afterwards we watched Back to the Future in Todd and Toby?s room (Travis Nichols and was there and he kept on pointing out flaws in it?s time travel logic, but in a funny, and not annoying, way). Then it was dinner at Subway where Todd though he spotted Mitch Pileggi (Skinner from the X-Files), and finally the Ignatz award ceremony.

- It was suggested by Dave and I pose as him and Todd as John if Teen Boat won, but they stuck around for the awards instead of going home, which was good cuz they won! So congrats to them. Though I do agree with Todd that we should have gone anyways and started a fight. It would have been a really awesome.

- Afterwards we all posed for pictures and chatted one last time. Then we all had cake. When James Kochalka came up to John to congratulate him, MK and I were standing from afar and I told her how funny it was, in a recent strip of his diary comic, that he characterized himself as a balding man-child. But James overheard me talking about him, and I think he thought I was mocking him (he kept making these quick glances at me). As cool as it would be to appear in his comic, I hope he doesn?t think I?m some jerk or anything.

- Afterwards MK & I hit the road. The drive back to NY/NJ normally takes about four hours, but our trip took five thanks to our hunt for a Wawa. Thankfully, we found one near Great Adventure and we both enjoyed the best chicken sandwiches known to mankind on the hood of the car. Later, she popped my bubble by saying that Cybertron, which I desperately wish was real, would probably be a horrible place to live due to the smell (I had always assumed Energon was void of any odor, but it is made from stuff like oil and other organic materials. That and she thinks the flying cars from the Back to the Future universe, which I desperately hope becomes real, would be a nightmare with all the crashes and ensuing accidental deaths. Some vision of the future?

Since getting home, around 4 in the morning, I haven?t had the chance to really look through all the stuff I got, so I really can?t say which was the best book from the show. But as of right now, it might have to be The Sky #3 from Jay Sayers. Personally, I can’t get enough interplanetary humor.

EDIT: I almost forgot, you can read other (perhaps more informative) reports of the show from both Dave and Raina (Telgemeier).